Family Communication on Behaviors and Emotions of Children

Mia Mclellan
Jan 16
10 min read

Human communication is vital when it comes to building human relationships.

It’s a way for people to express feelings, share ideas and understand one another.

Communication is a very broad topic when looking at it initially, but each form has its

own role. One of the most important forms is family communication. What children grow up experiencing and witnessing plays a huge role in their development and adult life. Children who are exposed to positive communication are more comfortable with expressing emotions and resolving issues (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). Similarly, authors Burleson and Kunkel in “Parental and Peer Contributions to the Emotional Support Skills of the Child: From Whom Do Children Learn to Express Support?” state “the quantity and quality of emotional support children receive from parents are important predictors of the child’s psychological and emotional adjustment” (Burleson & Kunkel, 2002). Learning emotional vulnerability and understanding feelings is an important skill for humans to learn at a young age. Doing so opens children up to better problem solving rather than making rash decisions. It also affects both current and future behaviors of children which can help avoid violence, in any matter, throughout their adult life.

When parents interact with their children, the way they go about it forms the

emotional and behavioral capabilities of the child (Haverfield & Theiss, 2017). Additionally, communication plays a huge role in social environments which can affect the way one feels, the actions they take and how they interact with one another (Vangelisti et al. 2007). Children’s total comfortability in social environments can reflect the socialization they have been exposed to. One of the most important roles in the socialization of adolescents comes from family (Pettigrew et al. 2020). The Family Communication Patterns Theory (FCP), highlights the two main communication patterns observed within families. These two patterns are conversation oriented and conformity oriented. Being a conversation oriented family doesn't always mean they prioritize conversations, there are both high and low examples. High-conversation oriented families encourage members to communicate frequently in efforts to socialize the children whereas low-conversation oriented families don’t see the need or importance of communicating private matters for the family or for the socialization of the children (Jones et al. 2017). Similarly, conformity oriented families have both high and low degrees. High-conformity oriented families are more concerned with the idea that children should be obedient to their parents with low levels of conflict while low-conformity oriented families are more equal to their children, treating them as their own individual encouraging personal growth (Jones et al. 2017). The way that a family chooses to communicate with one another, especially towards children, has deep connections to the emotional and behavioral future of a child. Positive communication leads to emotionally intelligent children with problem solving skills however, poor family communication leads to behaviorally and emotionally challenged children.

The levels to which children can control their emotions and understand their behavior is highly dependent on what they are taught from a young age. It’s no secret that children can easily be persuaded or taught just from what they witness or what is communicated towards them. Affable family communication emphasizes the focus on emotions and open communication which positively contributes to the self esteem and emotional well-being of children (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). Family communication has a much bigger role in the lives of children than some may realize. Positive and open communication gives children a feeling of safety and trust with their parents and peers. When families communicate in such a way with open expressiveness, there are fewer instances of child-to-parent violence (CPV) (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). Violent behaviors of children are highly dependent on emotions which can be controlled and understood in positive environments. Environments as such prevent the feeling of need for negative expression of feelings, which reinforces constructive conflict resolution (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). Similarly, research in regards to the FCP theory shows that conversation oriented families positively influenced the way members were able to adapt to and process situations (Jones et al. 2017). Children being able to understand their behavior and express emotions depends on the amount of socialization done as well as the nature of the socialization. Interactions between family members not only affect the way children perceive familial socialization but also socialization beyond that circle, such as with peers (Jones et al. 2019). This is why positive methods of communication are so important, especially towards adolescents.

The ability of a child to not only understand their own emotions but also positively cater to other emotional individuals is associated with their mothers ability to express her own positive support (Burleson & Kunkel, 2002). It is important for children to be exposed to positive behaviors surrounding emotions as they can be very controlling when it comes to decision making. The efforts that parents make to nurture their children and their behaviors towards that impact both the child’s emotional health and their ability to adjust socially (Burleson & Kunkel, 2002). Additionally, responses from parents that are sensitive and supportive improve the child’s ability to recognize emotion in social episodes and address them appropriately (Haverfield et al. 2017). Demonstrations of positive emotional and behavioral regulation from parents are structural factors to how a child will be able to regulate their own emotions and choices in all scenarios.

Just as positive examples play a role in how children understand, so do negative

examples. Specifically, parents have the most power to advance behavioral, social and emotional problems within their children (Lu et al. 2020). Negative family communication from a young age can lead to adult violence in other situations, mostly relating to lack of emotional control. Verbal hostility has significant influences on dating violence within adolescent relationships (Lu et al. 2019). Verbal hostility in familial communication has the most impact on children since many see family as what should be a child’s safe space. Constant exposure to hurt within family socialization can deeply affect the way members are able to understand and process other harmful interactions (Vangelisti et al. 2007) It can also cause children to be less emotionally vulnerable which can lead to them not expressing care to others emotions when a harmful environment stays continuous. Children who receive verbal hostility from their parents have been shown to have higher levels of anxiety and aggression (Vangelisti et al. 2007). Emotional neglect from family members has long lasting effects on children that can stay persistent even in adult life.

When family communication is more critical and derogatory towards one another, adolescents' emotional regulation and ability to express emotion lessens while negative emotions increase (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). With this, aggression and one’s ability to blame others prevails, along with the feeling of being misunderstood. Behavioral habits such as violence towards peers and even criminal behavior can be traced back to negative family communication, which also causes a basic distrust in adults (Lopez-Martinez et al. 2019). The lack of positive reinforcement can even lead to violence between children and parents, both verbal and physical. Additionally, families that are conformity oriented and suppress emotions have shown to have negative effects on the well-being and social

support of children (Jones et al. 2017). Because parents have such an influence on children, who are more likely to act in ways that are exemplified towards them, less emotionally open communication harms a child's emotional cognition. Similarly, insensitivity from parents can lead to distress in children and a higher chance of them acting out to feel recognized (Haverfield & Theiss, 2017). It is fundamental for the emotional growth of a child for parents to communicate a sort of individuality so children have the space to explore their own reasons why. Communication that is control focused can hinder a child’s growth in their own regulation of emotion and behavior (Haverfield & Theiss, 2017). Negative encounters within families can frustrate children which cause negative reactions and suppressed emotions.

Children’s emotional and behavioral control is highly dependent on how that

control is expressed through family communication. Positive communication is shown to shape children to be more open and expressive with their emotions which carries over to their ability to problem solve and support others. It can also improve self esteem, well-being and even their decision making throughout adolescence and adulthood. Negative communication is shown to have the same level of effects in harmful ways. It can increase violent behaviors and lessen emotional expressiveness. Lack of such can increase anxiety and confusion in children. There is more evidence as to how negative family communication can have lasting effects on children, later leading to reserved individuals. This begs the question of how severely does family communication affect the behavioral and emotional future of the child? There are both positive and negative connections however, poor family communication leads to behaviorally and emotionally challenged children.

RQ: How does family communication affect the behavioral and emotional future of a

child?

H: Poor family communication leads to behaviorally and emotionally challenged

children.

This topic being researched is highly crucial because the behaviors and emotions of a child are extremely important. Emotions can completely control what decisions are made, especially for a child who does not understand why they are feeling a certain way or how to control it. Family communication is a big factor when it comes to why children act the way they do, which even carries over to adult life. Growing up, our parents are the main people who teach us right from wrong, how to handle situations, how to communicate, etc. Even the smallest things that they may not see can affect a child. If significant research is done to see how much family communication can truly impact a child, then precautions can be taken to avoid such conflicts. Not only does family communication affect the way members can express themselves, but it also changes the way love is expressed with both familial and non-familial relationships. Understanding the why to a question gives people a better look at understanding how to fix or improve something.

For this research, I chose to use a survey method. The advantages of using a

survey to defend my hypothesis are that the participants would be able to answer multiple questions at the same time. This means I could use more specific questions that support each other in order to get a more accurate result. Another advantage would be the anonymity of the participants. This would help a lot because my hypothesis goes with a more personal topic and anonymity could make the participants feel more comfortable with being honest. A third advantage is that I could easily reach a larger group of people. With online surveys I could reach people that aren’t just directly close to me which could multiply the number of responses. Finally, the way I choose to design the survey has flexibility. There are many different kinds of surveys and scales I can use to measure. With a larger array of choices, I have the freedom to choose one most appropriate for this specific topic.

Although surveys can yield accurate results, there is still a lot of room for error.

This could be that not everyone who has access to the survey will take it. There is also

the chance that people won’t take it seriously and will just answer it without thinking.

Questions could also be lost in translation if they aren’t specific enough which would

increase the chances of a participant filling out a random answer. Participants may also interpret the survey questions or answers in different ways. “Somewhat disagree,” for example, may seem less aggressive to someone and more aggressive to another. It can be harder to gain a true understanding of someone’s feelings with broader answer choices.

The population that I am going to talk about will be both men and women

between the ages of 14 and 24. In order to gather a sample, I will send out the survey to as many people in that age range as possible. I will do as many people as possible because with surveys not everyone with access will respond. With this age range, there are some ethical concerns. Because some of the participants are minors, it may be harder for them to be able to respond. They also may feel worried that their parents would find out their answers and it could cause issues. However, there will be anonymity with responses that will be guaranteed at the beginning of the survey. With participants as young as 14, some may think they aren’t entirely sure of their answers. However, I chose to include a younger sample because there will be less chance of them forgetting how their family communicated during their childhood. I will also advertise it on social media where it is more likely that more people will see it. In order to protect their rights, the survey will be anonymously completed without having to sign into anything or write down a name. A link will be provided so that all the participants need to do is click on the link and complete the questions. For this research, I will find my participants using non-probability sampling, specifically volunteer sampling. Because the link will be advertised, the participants will be given the choice to take it. Because of this, it is not guaranteed I will fulfill every age in the population. There is also a smaller chance of diversity in the group because it is being left up to chance.

In order to collect data for this study, I will look at the answers from the survey. The answers from the survey will help because I will be able to analyze them to either support or reject my hypothesis. In order to analyze the data, my survey will be an online, cross-sectional survey. I will use a Likert scale of “strongly agree” to “strongly disagree” in order to capture the severity of the answers. To describe the scale, I will use the average answer for every question to determine whether poor family communication leads to emotionally and behaviorally challenged children.

*The purpose of this survey is to examine how families communicate and its

effects on the children between the ages of 14 & 24. The results of this survey will

be used in a study on how family communication affects the behavior and

emotions of children. This survey will be completed with complete anonymity

and guaranteed confidentiality. The answer scale will go from “strongly agree”

to “strongly disagree.” Please answer the following questions with full honesty

and to the best of your ability.*

Survey Questions:

1. My family communicates openly about feelings.